Day 44 - Friday 20th August 2010

Oh, frustration, frustration, frustration ! Have not felt great today, spaced out and slow, slow, slow. Am so desperate to get back to normality but it has only been a few days since the last zap so I guess my "Little Miss Impatient" side is coming through loud and clear - perhaps not so "little" at the moment though with all the yummies I have been snuffling !

Have been thinking too about how I have got to this point.

Five years ago when the breast cancer was discovered and the breast removed as a matter of course they checked the lymph nodes. There were half of the nodes infected. I was told at that point - half is borderline so I would have chemo as a precautionary measure, then radiotherapy as a precautionary measure and finally the, at the time, new wonderdrug Herceptin as a precautionary measure. All precautionary. I just had to do my five years and I was home free. To now be told by my consultant that there are an increasing amount of patients coming back with brain tumours following similar treatment is just unbelievable. Apparently, neither chemo nor herceptin treats the blood to the brain. Well you would think when you lose your hair with chemo that your whole head is being treated wouldn't you? Funny thing, I always wondered if there might be a rogue cell floating around somewhere - hey why did I ever think that?

Strange but true though - you might remember that I had a nasty fall flat on my forehead some months ago. I couldn't shake the headache off and my doctor sent me to hospital with a suspected fractured skull - I had a CT scan to the head. You know what? That CT scan was totally clear - there were no tumours evident then - I have seen the pictures. So is Cancer triggered? I believe it is and that fall was my ultimate undoing.


Photo: July 2007 in Portugal